Why tie knots? The trip

I’m looking at my little trash can, all the wads of paper crumpled around it.

From the looks of it, I can’t write anything worth reading. And I can’t seem to shoot a basket either.

The last five and a half months have been Monday through Sunday (over sixty-eight hours a week) and I’m finally catching up.

The equipment is purchased. The plane ticket is paid.

But until I’m in front of the monument and moving north, it’s not guaranteed.

Other hikers have already started their journey. Some have already covered considerable kilometers.

And this feeling of restlessness and anxiety has become overwhelming.

It has become so intense that I started to see it visually.

I am sitting in a room.

The musty smell fills my nostrils.

Suffocating humidity.

The paint is peeling off the walls. Desks surround me: splintered wood, rusted metal.

Remnants of rope still hang from them, evidence that others were tied at some point…

…but they managed to escape.

I desperately try to free myself, but time is running out.

Whoever tied these ropes knew exactly what they were doing. The more I fight, the more they squeeze me.

The door right in front of me creaks open an inch.

Then it slams shut.

Whispers echo through the room:

“Another one is about to break free…”

«…but it’s too late.»

«It’s going to be too hot.»

«He will not defeat winter.»

«He’s too old.»

I must write honestly if I hope to earn the trust of the people who follow my journey.

I am eighteen days away from starting my NOBO journey.

Physically I am prepared. Mentally I am prepared.

I refuse to be trapped inside a mental room created by my own imagination.

Tied to a desk with knots I tied myself.

Hearing whispers of doubt behind a door leading to the CDT.

On June 11th I will be using the tools I got from AT and PCT.

I will begin my walk.

I will accept the challenges that come my way.

And regardless of the result…

I will consider it a success.

This website contains affiliate links, which means The Trek may receive a percentage of any products or services you purchase using links in articles or advertisements. The buyer pays the same price they would otherwise pay, and their purchase helps support The Trek’s ongoing goal of bringing you quality backpacking information and advice. Thank you for your support!

For more information, visit the About page of this site.