FUD – The walk

Fear. Uncertainty. Doubt.

These are powerful emotions. Evil little creatures in our brains. Waiting for a chance to rear their ugly heads. And to top it all off, they have a finger on the button that controls the knots in their stomach.

AT is a breeding ground for FUD. It doesn’t take much, especially in these early days, to get the creatures to work, and they’ll be damned if they don’t hit that button every time. And the knots in our stomach begin to knot.

my fud

When I completed day 3 of my NOBO AT hike yesterday, I was sore. I had slept in a shelter on a 15 degree night. One morning I had put on cold, damp clothes and frozen shoes. I walked miles in 3″ of slush. I had scraped hundreds of fallen branches and branches. I had walked an entire day that never got above 35 degrees. I missed my wife and family. And despite all this, I had hiked 16.9 miles (25.1 with Approach Trail, but they don’t let you count the first 8.2!). For the math geeks, that’s 0.8% of the AT. Not 8%. But 0.8%.

Lots of material for Mr. Fear, Mr. Uncertainty and Mr. Doubt to come to blows. And they did it. And they pressed the button. And the knots in my stomach came.

What am I doing? Can I do this? I don’t think I can do this. Should I do this? What am I doing? Wait, I already asked that. Screw it, I didn’t respond the first time. So I ask it again.

But wait.

Along the way, some magical things happened.

the magic

I entered the path. I did it. 10 years of planning came together. Wow!

My wife said, «I’m so proud of you and I can’t wait to go on more adventures with you when you finish this one!» Wow!

My kids help me, encourage me, and call me “bad”! Wow!

I met Darren, then Brycen, then Campbell, then Impus and Bobo, then Lucky and Bounce (and stayed at their amazing hostel Above The Clouds), then Upstate, then Looking Glass and many more. Wow!

I saw the view from Preacher’s Rock. Wow!

I met day hikers like Mary Ann and Alex, and Bill (who found my Facebook channel and sent me messages of encouragement), groups of friends (like the four old friends from Collins Hill HS), and families hiking with their dogs. Everyone said, «you’ve got this,» «good luck,» and «we’ll follow you.» Wow!

And now what?

So if you’re coming after me this year, first a few notes:

• Be prepared for miles and miles of trail debris. It will take the GA Appalachian Trail Club a year to actually clear the path. They’ve already started cleaning, but it’s a mess.
• If you’re starting in the next few weeks, prepare for winter. Forecasts say things like “highs in the 50s,” but in the mountains that can mean 30 degrees. Forecasts say things like “lows in the 30s,” but in the mountains that can mean 20 degrees and wind chills in the 10s.

The most important thing is that if you come after me, know that FUD is waiting. And those knots in your stomach are coming. But remember, incredible moments are also yet to come. And they are bigger and stronger, and there are more than just FUD moments.

As many wise hikers before me have said, «the climbs always end,» «the rain always ends,» and «the cold nights always end.»

See you on the road!

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