I made the Sendero of the Apalaches join, but I renounced on the 4th of the collegiate loop (CO)

I outlined on the path of the Apalaches. I walked 2197.4 miles within 5 months, climbing 520,000 lift feet. I arrived 4 days and 40 miles in the university loop before leaving the path. There was a big difference.

Some context

Let me inform you because although there was a single background, there were many things that I considered before leaving the path.

I decided to walk through the university loop,

A 161 mile circuit in Colorado that overlaps both the Colorado path and the path of the continental division,

Simply because I couldn’t think of anything better to do. My most recent update on the walk had me on the Camino de Santiago. I will be honest that it was my last maximum, things have been in a little minimum since then. I arrived home after finishing the way, I worked on a seasonal job at New Hampshire, I visited at home, friends, at home again, I returned to the northeast for my car, took him to Colorado and that’s where I am now. I try as a nomad, but I realized that without a mission I feel lost as a nomad. It is really the life that I love most, but without a clear vision, it is really alone.

So why the loop?

I couldn’t think of anything better to do. I was floating in purgatory. Meanwhile, there is no mission of feeding my soul and does not feel comfortable. Then, instead of a place, I tried to chase a person. Birdie. The person who was in my maximum.

(If you are new to me, Birdie was my path name)

I have never felt more or more content than I had when I was in the AT.

The plan

I needed a mission. I needed to feel like me.

I had been feeling alone, without passion. In this time I also got sick. I had another planned trip. My first failure. He had never backed away from a path, but on day 2 he was so sick that he had no choice. I got off. He took a lot to deal with this decision. I wasn’t kind to myself.

I also experienced a great loss. Someone very close to me and my family spent unexpectedly and in a really tragic way. My plans changed, my mind accelerated, I grew more from myself.

I was in my lowest minimum in years.

Then I gave myself a mission. The university loop.

I thought about some goals for the loop. My reasons to be there. The things I needed to return, needed to practice.

I hoped to find passion.

I hoped to feel tired, feel done again.

I hoped to discover what I wanted for my life.

I needed to practice being alone again.

I needed to experience freedom again.

I needed to start something new. I needed a new adventure.

I needed to feel clean, renewed, passionate, strong.

Day 1 at the University Loop

The loop began very well. I only did 5 miles before facing my first pass, as well as my first storm. He arrived fast and hard, so I decided that at 3:30, I would establish the camp. I told myself that it was my first lesson. Patience and peace.

I found an incredible peace on this day. I read my book for hours, I heard the rain hitting my store, I breathed the fresh air, I felt happy.

I was alone, but that was a good thing. Complete freedom, silence, everything I expected to find and feel.

Day 2 in the collegiate loop

The morning was hard. Everything was wet and there was no sun, but I looked at him as my initiation. My welcome. I was so uncomfortable and so comfortable at the same time. A wonderful feeling.

The pass was hard. He took much longer than he had anticipated, but only made the upper part much sweeter.

I had a good conversation with a CDT through a hiker on my way. There were also several other hikers, mostly one -day hikers, but still. He had the feeling that the community was close.

I camped alone again, but hey, it was only the night 2. I was still comfortable. I finished my book and listened to the river running through the open space before me.

I didn’t think about how I had only seen some people. None of which I had seen before.

Day 3 at the Collegiate Loop

I woke up cold. There was a layer of frost above all. Everything was wet, but he was grateful that he had not been rain.

The sun never arrived in the camp that morning, I left before I could warm up.

There was another pass. It was less steep and shorter than the previous day, but at a higher height. It was very difficult, but again I reached the top. I felt strong and achieved. I went to the other side and had a beautifully carved path in front of me. I had service and called my dad while walking. I told him about beauty, but also on the few people along the way. The isolation.

I camped alone. I started a conversation with a hiker, hoping that they would stay and be someone with whom I could connect. They continued walking.

I put on my tent again. Cold, tired and demotivated.

I realized that I had burned 5000 calories that day, but I was absolutely no hunger or will to eat. That scared me.

I realized that each meal had passed alone. He would take a one -hour lunch and nobody would spend at that time.

I realized from the top of each pass I could see in miles. Uninterrupted beauty. It was beautiful. It was also empty. I could see for thousands and I couldn’t find a hiker.

I realized that I had spent 3 nights alone now. Despite more than 3000 miles on different paths, only 1 night had passed only before. Now he had gone 3 by 3.

I realized that all I wanted to do was be Birdie again and yet no one had asked my name. This hurts more.

Day 4 at the Collegiate Loop

I started the hopeful day. I told myself that it was a bad night. This was the Quid, if I continue, things would change.

The hope of finding motivation was the only motivation he had.

That is a sad realization.

I had an incredible morning. One that people wait, pursue for years. I had it by accident.

As I packed my things, I heard happy. Then I heard the rocks turned around the stream right in front of me. I knew knowingly.

They locked me in a contest of looks with a bull show. He was already a great charge. We look into our eyes for several minutes. A beautiful moment but one that also had my heart accelerating. An Alce is a creature to fear. I was afraid.

I stayed at the time, savoring beauty and rarity, but I am also fully aware of the power of an alce. I grabbed my camera and bent down. Making me small. I had not given him a reason to feel intimidated and had no intention of doing so. I stayed in this position for 15 minutes. When observing the water of his nose while he was breathing, he saw him walk through his territory, rubbing his antlers in the bushes. When I was no longer in sight, I didn’t waste time. I finished packing and left it to its territory.

Walking, I thought about how lucky I had. How incredible that moment was.

All I wanted was to tell someone about it. I had no service and I was not going to get it. I looked up and down the road, there were no other hikers.

I thought I would make me think of how happy I was about.

The reality is that it made me think that I had seen everything I came to see.

That told me a lot to me.

Technically I left the road twice …

I approached a car lot. I tried to access the service and get the weather forecast, but I failed. I asked a passerby and she told me that there was a chance of storms, but that it was low.

I had another 16 miles ahead of me, all above 12000 feet.

The heavens were beautiful, so I moved on. I reached the first beak, 1000 feet above the lot. I finally received service and reviewed the weather again. It had worsened. I stayed for another 30 minutes. Making my duolingo for the day and doing everything possible to send text messages to the closest to me. The weather had only worsened.

While alone and after having been on a crest exposed in a storm of thunder/rays before, I decided to go to the city for the day. Try it tomorrow.

I hooked a good view.

The final call

I was fighting a lot at this time. I was alone. Still. He hadn’t made friends. There was no one with whom to make friends. The only people who have asked me my name was the good couple that took me to the city.

I questioned. Why was it there? Did I want to be there first? I am hard. I got off because I was really worried about the weather or because it was a good excuse to leave?

I reassess the path. I will re -re -my miles to end on time. He assured a time for a job interview and a meeting with a friend. I was going to try.

I will not go into that because it is his own story, but the last carpet that held me was torn under me and I fell. Hard.

That was all. I was really at zero. Truly alone.

Roca background.

A new perspective

The rock bottom was quite pleasant. It was comfortable. Actually, it was the freer I’ve felt in a long time.

I realized that it was easier to start from scratch.

He had a tight hand so well around something he really wanted. Something I put a lot of energy. That meant that he only had one hand for everything else.

Without her I had both hands free.

It’s like Janis Joplin said: «Freedom is just another word so that there is nothing left to lose.»

And Wow, I had nothing left to lose.

And without motivation for the path.

I hope that the path would fix me. In a way he did. He broke to the point where I finally had a vision. A mission.

My mission

I was going to rebuild a life for me. I was going to start immediately.

I bought a Buena Vista bus ticket, I rescheduled my interview to be in person, I contacted a handful of routes for tours and moved away from the path.

Lessons learned

I learned a lot.

I learned that I am more than capable of being alone, but I am not happy this way. A favorite appointment of mine is that «if you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go away, go together.»

This path was a completely different challenge to the path of the Apalaches. Hiking is my passion, not my challenge. People is my strength, the lack of it is my ruin. I have said before that I could not complete the path of the Appalaches without my people. Snail Mail, Fire Male, Plate, Baby Driver, Nick (Shaggy), Bill (Scarface), Liberty, Hiawassee, 72 pick -Up, Frog, Haiku and many others. Now I know the truth that is that.

I have already included many photos of these people. It may not be our best, but I feel that you can see a lot of love in your imperfections. Left -> right baby driver, me, snail mail, freedom, fire magic, payment day, Hiawassee

This experience has been a real lesson. It made me feel grateful for those in my life. He has grateful for myself, he is no longer too stubborn to give up my mistakes. He made me thank the new opportunities.

I will surely return to this path. He was great and beautiful. I didn’t give up because I didn’t want to see every mile. I experienced some of the best views I have had the pleasure of seeing. I had literally bowed to nature and the creatures that patrol it.

He stripped me and exposed me. He gave me what he needed.

The path always provides.

My name is Alex Tucker and I am completely invested in this life. If you want to know more about me and my time on the way, you can follow me on Instagram @Nobo.nomad!